Author Dobrica Savić
Some days should have never started. We all have them and we recognize them immediately by the heavy loads they put upon us from the very beginning. We open our eyes and we open our mouths trying to breed. There is no air. We try to look for the Sun. We desperately search for any trace of light or a friendly face around us… but to no avail. Nothing works. Words come out the wrong way, doors close on us, locks stay locked. Life goes some other way. We try to smile, the world looks at us and pities us.
And then we put the blinds down on our souls to let the tears flow the opposite direction. We choke inside in the flood of our thoughts desperately trying to find an explanation – Why? Why is today against us and what is there for us tomorrow? Is there tomorrow? And if there is one, do we want it?
Emotions steer the heart, heart steers the blood, blood wonders through our body, but the body remains numb. There is no more hope that being good brings good. There is no more hope that we will be ever understood. And when there is no hope, everything is gone. How could there be any hope when even simple words don’t mean the same anymore. The world has changed. People are not the same anymore. We are not the same. Everything is different.
You can never step into the same river twice, a wise man concluded a long time ago, and that thought is the only one that stays with us now. Life passes by in a perpetual motion of desire and love, pain, and suffering. Should we continue and cause more pain to others and to ourselves or should we just close the book and admit that our story is only our story, that it means nothing to no one and that we should continue walking alone if we should walk at all…
November 2011, Vienna